At Night She Cries, While He Rides His Steed, by Ross Patterson
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At Night She Cries, While He Rides His Steed, by Ross Patterson
Ebook PDF At Night She Cries, While He Rides His Steed, by Ross Patterson
At Night She Cries, While He Rides His Steed is a side-splitting satire that perfectly parodies romance novels and western dramas.Our hero, Saint James Street James is a tall, extremely muscular, 32-year-old man whose attributes and possessions include a mind stronger than Socrates on acid, a magnificent horse he loves more than anything in the world, a package so large that it requires a signature, a beautiful, passionate wife with a rack so perfect it belongs on a billiard table, a ton of children, and his own personal gold mine. His life, set in 1849 against the backdrop of the California Gold Rush, is one long parade of amazing sex, dynamite montages, whiskey, and explosive gunfights. The kinds of things men could do when men were actually men. He is the richest man in town—equal parts loved and feared by all. But when the Schläger Brothers come to town, so too comes the end of the good times. St. James is forced to defend everything that matters to him (including, but not limited to: prostitutes, his horse, money, and drugs. Oh, and his wife and children too, sort of). God help anyone who stands in his way.
At Night She Cries, While He Rides His Steed, by Ross Patterson - Amazon Sales Rank: #27907 in Books
- Brand: Patterson, Ross
- Published on: 2015-06-09
- Released on: 2015-06-09
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 8.25" h x 1.10" w x 5.50" l, .0 pounds
- Binding: Hardcover
- 272 pages
At Night She Cries, While He Rides His Steed, by Ross Patterson Review “…do yourself a favor and get this thing close to your own eyeballs, because it’s hilarious.” (The Playboy Morning Show)
About the Author Ross Patterson is an actor, writer, and producer, first discovered selling hot dogs at a Bruce Springsteen concert at Staples Center in Los Angeles. Two weeks later he landed a lead role in the Sony Pictures film The New Guy, which went on to gross $60 million worldwide and he’s never looked back, since starring in more than twenty films. Through his production company Street Justice Films, Patterson has written, starred, and produced seven films and three television shows including 50K and a Call Girl, Helen Keller vs. Nightwolves, Poolboy: Drowning Out the Fury, and FDR: American Badass, as well as the 2008 pilot The Barnes Brothers for MTV and St. James St. James Presents for IFC in 2012. In 2008, Patterson was nominated for an MTV Movie Award for Best Young Filmmaker. He has twice won at the New York Television Festival, with a pilot acquired by IFC and a web series later purchased by Hulu.
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Most helpful customer reviews
3 of 3 people found the following review helpful. Hilarious and Compelling By ECtheG I'd recommend the hardback edition, since it contains really excellent illustrations and cover art that are worth experiencing in person.I first heard about this book when I read an interview in Vice Magazine with author Ross Patterson. He claimed that the novel harkens back to a time when men were men, and that we can learn a thing or two from the ways of our forefathers. I decided to pick it up and see what sort of valuable insights it might contain. What I got was an action fest of sex and gore, with a surprising amount of narrative depth and humor thrown in for good measure.The novel takes place in the mid-1800s and follows Saint James Street James on a roller coaster of fortunes. From being the richest, most badass guy in town to the most down-and-out, St. James takes it all in his manly stride. At first I was worried that the novel would be an unapologetic, Tucker Max-esque douche parade, but St. James' narration evolves with surprising depth. He gives us insight into not only his awesomeness, but also his weaknesses (few and stereotypically masculine as they are). The book is legitimately hilarious at times, mixing situational humor and modern pop-culture references evenly. The sex is graphic, but not overwrought. It's a fun and easy read that will keep the pages turning for the sake of the story just as much as the laughs. I'm not sure how much modern men can actually learn from At Night She Cries, While He Rides His Steed, but they'll definitely enjoy reading it.
8 of 8 people found the following review helpful. whether it be an awesome gunslinger, conquering the wild west with nothing but ... By Keith Ross What can I say about St James St James that hasn't already been said? The man, no, the God is a legend. From dynamite montages to inventing the first glory hole. He has seen and done it all, including your wife. Anytime a man falls asleep and dreams he is something more...whether it be an awesome gunslinger, conquering the wild west with nothing but his six shooters and trusty steed, or a man of the ladies...moistening the thighs of every woman who's gaze falls upon his hard penis pressing against his jeans...that's St James St James. There is no question on whether or not you should buy and read this book...but how many times. I myself have already read it three times. I recently caught myself trying to read it while driving so I decided to buy the audio book as well. To my surprise, the man reading the book is none other than St James St James himself! If you like gold rush Era westerns....buy this book. If you like sex...buy this book. If you like to laugh so hard at 3am because you can't stop reading the dam thing that you wake your neighbors up and they call the cops on you then you have to explain to the cops why you answered the door wearing nothing but a tube sock because you feel inadequate compared to St James (deep breath) buy this book...
2 of 2 people found the following review helpful. Romance Novel? NO, more like a how to guide for life! By James Dickerson This book is full of great life lessons. Do you need help raising a child in this day and age? Do you need to know how to satisfy a lover for both men and women? Looking for ideas to have a successful entrepreneurial venture? Wanting to learn about other cultures and how to interact with them? Do you in fact want to make a life change and be more of everything you can be? Well, this is the book for you! From the mind of Ross Patterson comes the story that will make you stop and think. It will make you laugh with quick witted jokes, cry with bold character struggle and strife, and reflect of how you can live life better! A true page turner with glorious illustrations both penned and painted via masterful words. I felt as if I was there all throughout the novel. I became a master of erotic lovemaking and of self defense after only two chapters and that is not all. The transcendence from the pages written in the American West that apply to all people of all walks of life is astounding. The bold use of psychology and social interpretation will make you draw into the book and apply these principals to life making you a success! I bought two copies one to hand out to friends whom I feel need a "shockaboocoo" (a swift spiritual kick to the head that alters your life forever) so to speak. After reading it the joys of life are opened up and you will have a better outlook, it's like literature's version of Zoloft. Thank you Mr. Patterson and to Mr. Saint James Street James my good sir may you never be extincted the world has and always will need men like you.
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