How to Tell if Your Boyfriend Is the Antichrist: (and if he is, should you break up with him?), by Patricia Carlin
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How to Tell if Your Boyfriend Is the Antichrist: (and if he is, should you break up with him?), by Patricia Carlin
Best PDF Ebook How to Tell if Your Boyfriend Is the Antichrist: (and if he is, should you break up with him?), by Patricia Carlin
Boyfriend From Hell or Perfect Angel? Your days of dating liars, cheaters, and total scumbags are over! Here are identifying characteristics for more than 70 potential boyfriends, along with advice about who to keep and who to kick to the curb. Find out if your guy is: • Married with Children • A Cult Leader • A Player • An Extraterrestrial • Actually Twins • And Dozens More! Includes a handy index of personality traits so you can quickly decipher the hidden meaning of all your boyfriend’s behaviors.From the Hardcover edition.
How to Tell if Your Boyfriend Is the Antichrist: (and if he is, should you break up with him?), by Patricia Carlin- Amazon Sales Rank: #963101 in eBooks
- Published on: 2015-06-16
- Released on: 2015-06-16
- Format: Kindle eBook
Review “A funny, sometimes offensive look at modern dating from a female perspective.”—McClatchy-Tribune “A very funny book for funny single ladies.”—News of Delaware County “This witty and irreverent guide may just save you from becoming permanently entangled with Mr. Wrong.”—Main Line Today
About the Author Patricia Carlin is a writer who lives in Ardmore, Pennsylvania.
Excerpt. © Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved. TABLE OF CONTENTSIntroduction How to Tell If Your Boyfriend Is . . . The Antichrist Obsessive-Compulsive A Closeted Homosexual Suffering from Amnesia A Pimp Actually Twins An Extraterrestrial A Commitment-phobe A Total Bastard Suffering from ADHD A Serial Killer An Enabler A Kleptomaniac A Robot A Scientologist A Trekkie A Hypochondriac A Slacker A Time Traveler from the Past A Misanthrope A Misogynist Actually a Woman In the Witness Protection Program Passive-Aggressive A Cult Leader Suffering from an Anxiety Disorder A Zombie A Polygamist An Ex-Convict Too Old for You A Rageaholic A Junkie An Illegal Alien Possessed by Demons A Workaholic A Pedophile A Bumpkin Suffering from Multiple Personality Disorder A Player A Fugitive from Justice Jealous A Hit Man Married with Children A Ghost An Alcoholic A Stalker A Psychic On Crystal Meth A Cross-Dresser A Nymphomaniac A Narcissist Addicted to Porn Bipolar A Mama’s Boy An Angel A Government-Trained Assassin Dyslexic A Renegade Cop Clinically Depressed Suffering from an STD Narcoleptic A Control Freak P-Whipped On Steroids A Homophobe A Compulsive Gambler A Gun Nut A Vampire Trying to Kill You Agoraphobic An Insufferable Bore A Crackhead A Pathological Liar Index by Trait Acknowledgments
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Most helpful customer reviews
15 of 15 people found the following review helpful. Accurate! By Emily Bannister When I received this book from my best friend, who swore my boyfriend was the anti-christ, I shrugged it off.Then she was like "Dude, you really need to read it."So I did.Wow.Not only was he the anti-christ, he was a total douche bag. At first I figured he was just a vampire, you know, because he never ate food around me and we had tons of sex, and only saw each other at night. I figured he was just really busy with "work" as a school teacher, but then I noticed that he wore True Religion jeans (something school teachers cannot afford) and visibly recoiled when I wore my favorite cross necklace. I was okay with dating a vampire, I mean it's the new thing to do, right? He also owns two vehicles, and 4 houses. Only vampires would pose as 28 year-old men and own multiple properties. Vampires are always willing to enter the real estate world whole-heartedly because when their tenants don't pay up, they eat them, especially here in the south, where undocumented workers turn up missing but not a lot of effort goes into actually finding them?Anyway, it explains a lot of why, after we had sex, he would be unreachable for up to four days! Then he would contact me and seduce me, like a vampire, back into my bedroom, and I would wake up alone and tired (he might have bitten me and then healed me as to not leave scars).He posed as an Athiest (typical vampire move) and had pasty white skin, and also claimed that he had lost count of how many sexual partners he's had (which is easy to do when you are hundreds of years old).This book really helped me to realize that my anti-christ friend with benefits would never be more than just that, which was really depressing at first, but I got through it. This book is a lifesaver. I even told him that we couldn't be together because I am human and he is, well, a vampire anti-christ. He just called me crazy and told me to never speak to him again, which is understandable, because breaking up is hard for everyone!
9 of 9 people found the following review helpful. How to Tell If Your Boyfriend Is the Antichrist: the Game, can't be far behind! By R S Cobblestone How to tell if your boyfriend is the Antichrist:1. Does he skip saying "God bless you" when you sneeze?2. Does he not care about WWJD (What would Jesus do)?3. Does he forego recycling?4. Is he self-conscious about his cloven hooves?How do you tell whether he is a robot, a Trekkie, a twin, or a woman?These, and many other "red flag" labels for potential boyfriends are cleverly discussed by Patricia Carlin in this neat, small, and R-rated book. She continues with strategies to consider if you, indeed, find out that "Roger" is a Scientologist, a serial killer, or a polygamist! Witty, witty. This would be a great book to pull out at a party with friends. Take turns reading each page. In fact (and you heard it first here), I suspect this would make a great party guessing game, so move over Trivial Pursuit!
8 of 8 people found the following review helpful. Absolutely hilarious By Nicole Solis In the current market of "gift books," sometimes I wonder if there's really room for another. But when I picked up "How to Tell If Your Boyfriend Is the Antichrist," I started laughing out loud from the first page and couldn't put it down until I read the entire thing. Don't skip over the acknowledgements page, which is yet another example of Carlin's hilariously dry writing style.
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